The Shamanic Journey: A Healing Mirror to the Highs and Lows of Bipolar Disorder
A discussion of the remarkable similarities between bipolar disorder symptoms and the call to the shamanic path
The bipolar mind is a shamanic landscape, where the soul journeys through chaos to find enlightenment.
In 2017, a severe psychotic episode landed me in a psychiatric ward for almost two months. The experience was traumatizing and its aftermath led to some of the darkest years of my life.
I spent most of that time in grueling EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing) therapy sessions.
I was desperate to reframe the havoc psychotic thinking wreaked on my mind as well as the terrifying experiences I had during the months I was in a psych ward.
I saw one woman break both her arms on the window of a seclusion room; I heard people screaming nonsense throughout the day and night (sometimes that person was me); I was forcibly restrained to a bed on multiple occasions for hours at a time, you get the picture.
It was horrible.
There was nowhere else I could have lived safely in that state of mind, but sadly I left the ward with more trauma than when I came in.
The worst part about it was my experience solidified a terrifying suspicion I had all my life: I was severely mentally ill.
This was a truth I had been running from for 25 years.
The experience also taught me what it feels like to be treated as less than because of my mental health. The ward I was in was more of a holding cell than anything.
I could speak to the nurses and doctors but they looked right through me like I was a ghost.
These were the messages I heard loud and clear after my experience in the psych ward: you are sick, you will not get better, and you are more limited in what you do than most people.
Unfortunately, these messages turned out to be harsh truths.
I am sick. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder type 1, a mood disorder characterized by mania and suicidal depression.
I will not get better: symptoms of bipolar disorder can be managed, but the condition is chronic and lifelong.
I am more limited in what I do than most people: I need more sleep, structure, and discipline. I need to take medication, see a psychiatrist, go to therapy regularly, and practice yoga, meditation, and breath work — all just to feel okay. I’ve accepted these truths. Stubbornly, at first.
It was more like I surrendered to them.
As you can imagine, it doesn’t feel great to feel limited.
I didn’t feel great when this was part of my mindset. I didn’t feel great until I realized limits are there for a reason: they are like guideposts along a path unfolding more perfectly than the human mind can imagine. They steer you towards the person you are meant to be.
The purpose of this article is to offer a different perspective on a severe mental illness to facilitate healing in those affected by it.
Everything I’d been through — a psychotic episode, two suicide attempts before the age of 25, moods that made me feel as raw as if I was born without skin, the confusion, the paranoia, the reckless impulsivity — had no meaning, and therefore could not be transcended, until I dramatically changed the way I viewed being “sick”.
Simply put, this is not a disease to be taken lightly. But what if it is more than just a sickness?
The traditional way of viewing bipolar disorder as a terrifying disability wasn’t working for me, but I still needed to acknowledge it could kill me if I didn’t take care of it.
I needed to treat the “illness” with sacred care.
Somewhere in the chaos of my psychotic episode, in the anger at the injustice of psychiatric wards, a fire inside me started to burn. A light turned on and everything changed.
Prior to the psychotic episode, I had no spiritual beliefs or practices. This changed almost immediately — I began praying when I was in the psych ward.
I don’t believe this is a coincidence (although I don’t mind if you do).
Strangely enough, the chaotic shift in my consciousness after psychosis combined with deep inner work in therapy led me to experience a profound spiritual awakening.
The psychotic episode acted as a catalyst for a massive transformation in the way I care for my mental health. For the first time in my life, space was created in my head to accept alternative possibilities to my belief system.
I always viewed myself as fucked up.
After my spiritual awakening, I saw that all my limits were doors to incredible healing gifts. I could step through these doors into another world if I was willing to approach my illness with divine curiosity rather than fear.
Something in my soul shifted after psychosis; it was like the spiritual part of me was previously blocked and then suddenly — and violently — the block was ripped away.
I’ve always believed there to be some spiritual connection to the psychotic episode I had.
This could be partially due to the fact that, at the time, most of my delusions were spiritual in nature, which is not uncommon for a bipolar psychotic episode.
I hadn’t considered the spiritual aspects of my psychotic episode could be more than just symptoms, however, until my newfound thirst for spiritual knowledge led me to begin reading about shamanic initiations.
There, I did find meaning in the psychotic episode, albeit in a different way than I expected.
I also found a better way to define my bipolar disorder.
Or, more accurately, the better perspective found me, as things often do on the spiritual path.
The Shamanic View of Mental Illness
Shamanism is the oldest form of spirituality on the planet and traces of shamanic practices have been found all over the world.
The noun shaman comes from the word saman of the Evanki tribe of Siberia, which when translated means ‘to know oneself’.
Traditionally, the shaman is a healer and is highly respected in the community as they carry a great sense of responsibility. The shamanic view of reality is about connection and communion with the spirits that reside in all things.
Shamans were often chosen by inheritance, or by spontaneous ‘calling’, such as the sudden onset of an incurable physical or mental illness. — The Essential Book of Shamanism by Suzanne Edwards
Many indigenous shamans believe psychosis is simply an imbalance of psychic energies in a sensitive (or mentally ill by Western standards) person’s body; or an initiation to begin to awaken to one’s psychic gifts.
Sensitive, in the shamanic context, means the gift of being open to receiving and sharing messages from the spiritual world.
‘Sensitivity’, in the way shamans view it, is considered a mental illness in the Western World.
Upon learning this, I began to look at my disorder through the lens of it being a gift rather than an illness. Something to care for rather than simply treat. Something to be approached with a sacred touch, the way you’d stroke the petals of a rose.
My hypersensitivity and full spectrum of emotion always seemed like weaknesses up until that point.
I was not careless enough to think this meant throwing all caution to the wind and living untreated and unmedicated. Instead, I saw taking care of my disorder as an honor.
I saw I was blessed with certain sensitivities that needed to be properly tended to in order to follow the path I was chosen for: the path of the shaman.
My illness is a divine blessing and my limits keep me on the path of sharing this divine blessing with others.
The transformation began after I answered the call to take care of my mind as a shaman would, because someone, somewhere in the world would someday need a healing message I’m meant to deliver.
The psychotic episode was an opening of psychic gifts available to me if I took responsibility for my mental health.
So, I took that responsibility seriously and began to study the shamanic path in addition to continuing my other mental health practices. And so began the journey towards healing after the acceptance of a diagnosis, my recognizing of the divine components of this process, and an entirely new perspective on my symptoms, which, once properly managed, could now be considered spiritual strengths.
I am talking about a journey from ignorance and naivety to enlightenment and responsibility; a path that reveals previously hidden, extraordinarily mystical puzzle pieces of this complex mental illness.
The shamanic path is one that parallels the highs and lows of bipolar disorder itself, as it carries one from the deepest depths of darkness into the light.
“In the shamanic view, mental illness signals the birth of a healer.” — Malidoma Some, West African Shaman
The universe has a mysterious way of subtly weaving threads between seemingly distinct realms, almost as if to provide the analytical human mind with evidence that everything in our world is indeed connected.
Looking closely, there are remarkable parallels between two apparently separate aspects of the human experience: the shamanic journey, a core practice in various indigenous cultures, and the manic highs and depressive lows of bipolar disorder.
While these two phenomena emerge from different contexts — one rooted in spirituality and healing traditions, the other in the realm of mental health — there exist intriguing commonalities in their underlying themes, experiences, and transformative potential.
The Call to the Shamanic Path
In the shamanic context, initiation rituals and calls to the journey often involve a near-death experience or sudden and severe illness, which can occur any time from childhood onward.
The crisis or illness typically doesn’t respond to treatment, and sometimes the initiate enters a kind of spiritual battleground in which they must choose to follow the path or succumb to their sickness.
Similarly, individuals with bipolar disorder often undergo a life-altering experience during manic or depressive episodes.
I certainly did.
Although these episodes can be managed with medication and therapy, bipolar disorder is a life-long condition without a cure; therefore those living with bipolar disorder are forced to upon a path of healing and self-discovery, the path of the shaman, to survive the sickness.
The journey towards successful symptom management is the spiritual battleground those with bipolar disorder must enter to avoid living as a victim to their condition.
And a battleground, it is.
Navigating through this darkness involves acknowledging and accepting all of ones shortcomings as a result of the illness.
There is no one-size-fits-all treatment for bipolar disorder, and often times medication combinations must be tweaked; different types of therapy and healing modalities must be explored.
Trauma from the drastic highs and lows must be addressed.
The Initiation to the Shamanic Path: Navigating Through Darkness
The initiation to the shamanic path calls for one to journey through the darkest depths of one’s soul to find truth.
The darkness involves looking in a mirror with ethereal honesty and deciding to do whatever it takes to lead the best life you can with what you see.
For shamans, this decision is ultimately what leads an initiate to grow into a healer, this is the answer to the shamanic call.
At first glance, all one sees in this mirror is negative.
This is heartbreaking.
I consider my psychotic episode the spiritual mirror I was forced to look at. I saw that I was severely mentally ill, I saw that I was not taking care of it, and I saw the chaos of psychosis that resulted. I saw that I could be lost in this chaos forever if I did not make the best of my circumstances. I saw that, if I wanted to live, I didn’t really have a choice in the matter.
I had to figure out how to heal.
In the shamanic path, those chosen to navigate between spiritual realms often have no say in the matter at all and are forced to cope with darkness utterly unfamiliar to most people. They are chosen to make their way through darkness most people could not withstand to earn access to the spiritual gifts given to them as a birthright.
I didn’t realize the depth of the darkness I was dealing with until I had a conversation with my mom and my sister about suicidal thoughts. Both of them were adamant they had never seriously considered it.
I was in disbelief upon hearing this.
I had spent years of my life battling suicidal thoughts. Years of my life daydreaming about suicide to escape the mental anguish I was in. I had two serious suicide attempts before the age of 25 (before I was diagnosed).
The experience of the ‘lows’ would be more accurately described as hell: a hell I didn’t choose, which is exactly what the call to shamanism looks like.
Answering the Call to the Shamanic Journey
“The healing hero, therefore, is the one who finds some creative way out, a way not already known, and does not follow a pattern. Ordinary sick people follow ordinary patterns, but the shaman cannot be cured by the usual methods of healing. He has to find the unique way, the only way that applies to him. The creative personality who can do that then becomes a healer and is recognized as such by his colleagues.”
― Marie-Louise von Franz, The Problem of the Puer Aeternus
Anyone inflicted by bipolar disorder has an opportunity to answer the call to the shamanic journey.
Feeling deeply is the blessing and the curse of the disease.
When properly managed, these deep feelings allow those inflicted to access an ocean of empathy, which can be channeled into healing abilities.
Those living with bipolar disorder understand deep emotions and are therefore able to sit comfortably as healers in situations others without the disorder may not be able to relate to.
The challenge is in the preparation to sit comfortably, or rather, in answering the call.
Answering the call to shamanism in terms of bipolar disorder means making the decision to do whatever it takes to become confident enough to transcend any and all emotions in order to channel them into healing energy.
This process will look different for everyone, as everyone’s symptoms are different.
The following sections of this article will describe similar steps everyone can take to find out what combination of healing modalities is needed for individual symptom management. The steps do not need to be followed in any particular order and any combination of them can be used to practice modern shamanism.
These are steps to find your unique way, which is the only way, that will place you on the path to healing and channeling your healing abilities for the greater good.
1. Finding Training and Mentorship
Answering the call to the shamanic path, after the initiation phase, involves recognizing one is in desperate need of training and mentorship.
For shamans in indigenous cultures, this means learning from elders or those with more experience. In other words, it is respecting the wisdom of those who have already perfected their craft.
In the context of someone living with bipolar, this means finding an effective therapist or psychiatrist — preferably both. Indigenous shamans typically have more than one mentor.
Mentorship is essential on the shamanic path while navigating bipolar disorder. You have to be able to surrender your trust completely to the mentors you choose for this to be purposeful, allowing their wisdom to guide you in times where darkness is blinding.
Training involves becoming insatiably curious about all healing modalities relating to developing one’s unique gifts. This means engaging in ritual practices that assist one in managing their thoughts and emotions, both of which have a tendency to spiral out of control in bipolar disorder.
Meditation is one shining example of a way to sharpen one’s sensitivity under calming circumstances that feel safe.
Shamans across the world have be known to regularly engage in meditative practices to connect with the spiritual world. It’s also an effective way to stabilize any energetic imbalances within the body as it’s been proven to calm the central nervous system.
If one approaches their training and mentorship with the sacred dedication of a shaman and is able to follow the advice of their mentors, there is no doubt one can continue successfully on the path.
2. Establishing Sacred Ritual
“Shamanic rituals, ceremonies and traditions represent the first religious experiences of humanity. Yet shamanism is not a form of religion, since it is not based on any fixed dogma or system.
Essentially, it is more of a worldview — a way to live in harmony with the spirits of nature.
The shaman is psychically wired into the universe.
There is no library, no lab, no doctrine, no dictionary of specialized terms, no how-to manuals, no peer-reviewed papers, no online courses, no hotlines to consult on issues as they arise in a tribe.
Shamanism is a loose agglomerate of mind-blowing techniques, largely uncatalogued, intuitive methods of attaining a very special kind of experience — a journey to the edges of our inner cosmos.
It is through these kinds of mystic encounters that we aim to reconnect with our roots, finding spiritual balance and understanding our place in the universe.” — Scorpios Mykonos, ‘Altered States: The Power of Shamanic Rituals’
Ritual, both in shamanism and in the care of bipolar disorder, is absolutely essential. The energy of a repeated practice grows each time one engages in it. Routine has also been proven to assist in managing bipolar symptoms.
From my personal experience, routine is a cornerstone of managing my bipolar disorder. The predictability of a set schedule makes it easier for me to cope with unpredictable emotions.
There is something about engaging in a practice I’ve done hundreds of times that quiets my conscious mind and allows me to connect deeper with subconscious thought.
For me, my morning beach run with my dog is my most sacred ritual. The rigorous and mindless exercise helps me feel more resilient throughout the entirety of the day. I also feel completely connected to the universe on the beach in the morning; my body basks in orange glow of the sunrise sparkling off the ocean as I move. There is quiet in the sunrise that I can’t find anywhere else.
I would suggest getting up early, if your schedule allows, to practice some type of ritual where you will not be disturbed by anyone else.
If you are seriously pressed for time, try to make a ritual you already engage in sacred to you in some way by saying a short prayer before you begin.
You can pick something as simple as brushing your teeth or drinking coffee; just make sure it is something you do each day, preferably at the beginning of the day.
What you do in the morning will affect your energy for the rest of the day, so ritual is important.
3. Recognizing and Taking Advantage of Altered States of Consciousness
Those living with bipolar do not need these things to access altered states of consciousness, as mania, hypomania, and suicidal depression are altered states of consciousness which are inherent parts of the disease.
Even when the disorder is successfully treated, it is inevitable one will still experience these states at certain times, albeit to a lesser and less dangerous degree than if the disorder is untreated.
Following the path of the shaman involves tracking one’s moods in order to recognize when one has entered any of these states.
This is important because instead of focusing on the painful aspects of experiencing these uncomfortable states, one can instead turn the mind towards the messages received during these episodes.
For example, a bout of suicidal depression will be accompanied by suicidal thoughts, and rather than listening to these thoughts, one can learn to watch them from a shaman’s perspective with brutal but necessary honesty.
If a thought during depression says, ‘you’re pathetic’ one can examine this thought with divine curiosity.
Is it true?
If so, is there anything one can do to change this truth?
If not, is there anything one can do to change the conversation?
Or, is the lesson simply to be able to sit with these thoughts and not internalize them? These are the ways in which a shaman would examine thoughts during these altered states.
A shaman would take advantage of the opportunity to explore the mind during altered states of mania, hypomania, or depression to shed light on the darkest corners of the mind in order to know oneself more deeply.
Knowing oneself deeply allows one to know others to the same depths, and those who experience the highest of highs and lowest of lows have a unique opportunity to know themselves completely. This is something that will resonate with the energy of others almost immediately, allowing for a deep healing connection that encourages others to explore themselves and their trauma.
4. Grounding & Protecting Your Energy
Shamanism is rooted in fostering a deep connection with nature and all the healing energies the Earth has to offer.
Shamans consider themselves ‘sensitive’ to all spirits and things, regardless if these energies are positive or negative, therefore it is necessary to use protection practices to ground and cleanse one’s energy on a regular basis.
Many books I’ve read about shamanism discuss doing visualization exercises when one feels the energy of a person, place, or thing is ‘off’. We’ve all come into contact with someone who drains our life force, or spills their sadness over onto us, or invades our energetic boundaries.
To remedy this, a simple practice of picturing oneself cloaked in a white protective light helps guard our energy. I do this when the energy of others feels off, but I also practice it when my own energy feels off as well.
The deep feelings of bipolar disorder can be off putting to those with high empathy, and I’ve found when I use this practice I can interact with people without negatively affecting them no matter what mood I am in.
Stabilizing one’s energy regularly is also important in addition to protective visualization. Grounding or earthing is the easiest way to do this, and is also scientifically proven to benefit overall health.
“Earthing (also known as grounding) refers to the discovery that bodily contact with the Earth’s natural electric charge stabilizes the physiology at the deepest levels, reduces inflammation, pain, and stress, improves blood flow, energy, and sleep, and generates greater well-being.” — Science Direct
The simplest way to practice grounding is to walk barefoot on the earth. You can walk in any natural environment to do this as long as your skin has direct contact with the ground.
I love to walk barefoot in soft grass, but walking on the beach in the sand is my favorite way to practice grounding. The highs and lows of bipolar disorder create massive imbalances in the physical body, and practicing grounding is a simple and effective way to stabilize one’s physiology.
The recommended time frame for a grounding practice is usually twenty minutes, but any amount of time can have benefits.
5. Practicing Movement & Utilizing Music
Both movement and music can act as portals to altered states of consciousness. They can also help remove or cleanse stagnant energy within the body.
Movement like yoga is wonderful because it can be gentle enough for beginners or rigorous enough to challenge those with experience. Any type of routine exercise is beneficial for bipolar disorder, though, because it helps regulate the body and mind.
I would suggest exploring all different types of movement until you find a practice that you can enjoy enough to do everyday. I’ve tried all different types of exercise but I like to switch it up when I get bored so I can stay dedicated to performing it daily.
I also create playlists without words so I can get into a meditative state while I exercise.
You can also explore different types of sound healing, all of which help to calm the mind and body.
Each time you repeat a certain type of exercise or play a specific song, you are creating more space for sacred energy to become associated with these things. Repetition is incredibly powerful when it comes to both movement and music.
7. Establishing Sacred Places in Nature
Repetition is also powerful when it comes to the places you visit in nature. The more you visit one place, the more sacred that setting becomes to your energy.
Every time you visit with the intention of connecting with nature that connection grows stronger.
Shamans across the world have been known to utilize sacred spaces in nature for ceremonies and meditation purposes.
I mentioned earlier that I run on the beach every morning.
Halfway through my run, I stop at a public tiki hut (I live in Florida) and practice a few minutes of mindfulness or meditation. I’ve been doing this for about five years.
Now, whenever I enter the tiki, an overwhelming sense of peace and calm washes over me. I’ve gone to that tiki on many days when I felt like giving up, only to leave the spot reborn after a few minutes of calm reflection.
Find a spot you can visit every day, even if it is just a patch of grass in your yard or near where you live. If you live in a city, places like rooftops or libraries where you can find some quiet might be more appropriate.
Try to sit or stand in the same spot each time you visit to charge yourself with the divine energy you’ve created.
8. Finding A Community to Give Back To
I highly encourage anyone interested in shamanism to find a community to give back to as soon as they can.
As mentioned in the introduction, the steps outlined in this article do not have to be followed in order (or followed at all, shamanism is all about creating your own path).
I recently became a certified yoga instructor and I plan on becoming certified in Reiki as well. These are ways in which I’ve chosen to let my healing energy flourish, but your presence alone heals others when you’ve faced the darkness within yourself, so you can choose whatever way feels right to you.
There’s plenty of homeless or animal shelters that need help and don’t require any certification. You’ll find that giving back is the most rewarding part of the shamanic journey.
Final Takeaways
Shamanism is about journeying through one’s darkness in order to create transformation to evolve and stay in flow with the ever-changing energies of our world.
Bipolar disorder, in the shamanic context, is a diagnosis that would be considered a calling to the shamanic path because it gives the afflicted access to the full spectrum of human emotion and, in turn, heightened sensitivities and empathy.
With sacred care, those afflicted by bipolar disorder can re-identify their symptoms as spiritual gifts. Each time a symptom is addressed and cared for, another spiritual gift will arise.
I like to believe this notion to be true not just for bipolar disorder, but all ‘mental illnesses’.
If you are sick, you might just be a chosen one.
